When Harry Met Sally Page #6

- Where is this place?

- Somewhere on the next block.

I can't believe I'm doing this.

Harry is one of my best friends

and you are one of my best friends.

And if you two hit it off, we could still

be friends, instead of drifting apart

like you do when you date someone

who doesn't know your friends.

You and I haven't drifted apart

since I started seeing Arthur.

If Arthur ever left his wife

and I actually met him,

I am sure that you and I would drift apart.

He's never gonna leave her.

Of course he isn't.

You're right. I know you're right.

- I dunno about this.

- It's just a dinner.

I've finally gotten to a place where I'm

comfortable with just me and my work.

- If she's so great why don't you date her?

- I told you. We're just friends.

- So she's not attractive?

- No, she is attractive.

- You said she had a good personality.

- She has a good personality.

What?

When someone's not attractive, they're

described as having a good personality.

If you'd asked about looks and

I'd said "She has a good personality",

she's not attractive.

But because I mentioned she has

a good personality, she can be either.

Attractive with a good personality,

or not attractive with a good personality.

- So which one is she?

- Attractive.

But not beautiful, right?

It's like, whenever I read Jimmy Breslin,

it's as if he's leaving a wake-up call

- for the City of New York.

- What d'you mean by a "wake-up call"?

He's saying that we've got people

in the city who are on welfare...

Would I have seen any of your windows?

A couple of weeks ago

I did a thing with hostages.

- The people in blindfolds.

- Yeah.

I thought it was like late '80s.

That's interesting.

Let's just say I'm not

a big fan of Jimmy Breslin.

Well, he's the reason I became a writer,

but that's not important.

Harry, you and Marie

are both from New Jersey.

- Really?

- Where?

- South Orange.

- Haddonfield.

- So, what are we gonna order?

- I'm gonna start with the grilled radicchio.

Jess, Sally is a great orderer.

Not only does she pick the best,

but she orders it in a way even the chef

didn't know how good it could be.

- Restaurants have become too important.

- I agree.

"Restaurants are to people in the '80s

what theatre was to people in the '60s."

I read that in a magazine.

I wrote that.

- Get outta here.

- No, I did! I wrote that.

I've never quoted anything

from a magazine. That's amazing.

Don't you think that's amazing?

And you wrote it?

I also wrote

"Pesto is the quiche of the '80s."

- Get over yourself!

- I did!

- Where did I read that?

- New York Magazine.

Sally writes for New York Magazine.

You know, that piece had a real impact

on me. I don't know much about writing...

It spoke to you, and that pleases me.

I mean, you have to admire people

who can be that articulate.

Nobody has ever quoted

me back to me before.

I've been looking for a red suede pump.

What do you think of Jess?

- Well...

- Do you think you could go out with him?

- I don't know...

- Cos I feel really comfortable with him.

- You wanna go out with Jess.

- If it would be all right with you.

Sure. Sure. I'm just worried about Harry.

He's sensitive, he's going through a rough

period, and I don't want you to reject him.

I wouldn't. I totally understand.

If you don't think you're gonna call Marie,

do you mind if I call her?

- No, no.

- Good. Good.

But for tonight you shouldn't.

I mean, Sally's very vulnerable right now.

You can call Marie, but wait a week or so.

Don't make any moves tonight.

Fine. No problem.

I wasn't even thinking about tonight.

Well, I don't feel like walking any more.

I think I'll get a cab.

- I'll go with you.

- Great! Taxi!

A man came to me and said

"I found nice girl for you."

"She lives in the next village

and she is ready for marriage."

We were not supposed to meet

until the wedding,

but I wanted to make sure.

So I sneak into her village,

hid behind a tree,

watch her washing the clothes.

I think if I don't like the way she looks,

I don't marry her.

But she looked very nice to me.

So I said "OK" to the man.

We get married.

We married for 55 years.

FOUR MONTHS LATER

- I have to get this.

- Harry, we're here for Jess and Marie.

- We'll find something. Great stuff.

- Should have gone to the plant store.

- Here. Perfect for them.

- What's that?

Battery-operated pith helmet, with fan.

- Why is this necessary in life?

- I don't know.

Look at this. Also makes great fries.

Good. Call off the dogs. The hunt is over.

Sally, this is the greatest.

Sally, please report to me.

Look. This is the greatest.

You're gonna love this.

This is a singing machine. Look, you sing

the lead and this has the backup.

- This is from Oklahoma!

- "Surrey with the Fringe on Top".

Yes, perfect.

~ Chicks and ducks and geese

better scurry

~ When I take you out in my surrey

~ When I take you out in my surrey

with the fringe on top

Now you!

~ Watch that fringe and see how it flutters

~ When I drive those

high-steppin' strutters

~ Nosey pokes'll

peek through the shutters

~ And their eyes will pop!

~ The wheels are yellow,

the upholstery's brown

~ The dashboard's genuine leather

~ With isinglass curtains that will ro...

What?

It's my voice, isn't it? You hate my voice.

- I know, it's terrible. Joe hated it...

- It's Helen.

Helen?

She's coming right towards me.

- How are you, Harry?

- Fine. I'm fine.

This is Ira Stone. Harry Burns.

Harry.

I'm sorry. This is Sally Albright.

Helen Hillson

and Ira.

Sally.

- Nice to meet you.

- Hi.

Well...

- See you.

- Yeah. Bye.

Nice to meet you, Ira.

You OK?

Yeah, I'm perfect.

She looked weird, didn't she?

She looked really weird.

- I've never seen her before.

- Trust me. Her legs looked heavy.

- Must be retaining water.

- Harry!

Believe me, the woman saved everything.

Sure you're OK?

I'm fine.

Look, it had to happen at some point.

In a city of eight million, you're bound

to run into your ex-wife. So it happened.

And now I'm fine.

I like it. It works. It says "home" to me.

All right. All right.

We'll let Harry and Sally be the judge.

What do you think?

- It's nice.

- Case closed.

Of course he likes it - he's a guy.

Sally?

What's so awful about it?

It's so awful, there's no way to begin

to explain what's so awful about it.

Honey, I don't object to your things.

If we had room, you could put

your things in it, like your bar stools...

Honey, wait, wait. Honey, wait.

You don't like my bar stools?

Harry, come on,

someone has to be on my side.

I'm on your side.

I just want you to have good taste.

I have good taste!

Everybody thinks they have good taste,

but they couldn't all have good taste.

You know, it's funny.

We started out like this, Helen and I.

We hung things, we picked out tiles

together. Then you know what happens?

Six years later you're singing "Surrey

with the Fringe on Top" in front of lra!

- Do we have to talk about this right now?

Rate this script:4.0 / 4 votes