When Harry Tries to Marry Page #3

conclusion that if l don't give you...

...my blessing, l'll have to hire

publicists and lawyers to do damage...

...control.

- Thanks. l'm so glad to hear that...

..your heart is in the right place.

- My heart?

l don't see your father

lending a hand.

- Hey.

- Hey.

Sorry to show up unannounced.

l tried to call you a few times.

Yes. l meant to get back.

lt's just that l've been awfully...

...distracted.

Well, hello.

Come in.

Oh, wow!

Will you look at that!

Congratulations, Angela.

When did this--

- lt's a girl.

- Well, that's fantastic.

l'm so happy for you. l really am.

God, l don't know what to say.

Maybe we should toast or something.

- She's yours, Dev.

What? Mine? How--

How could it be mine?

No, no, no.

Angela, don't cry.

That's not what l meant.

Sit down, please.

Sit down.

l didn't mean that.

- Who is it?

- Dad, would you open...

...the door already?

- l'm not home. Come back later.

Harry l--

Dad, are you gonna help me or not?

We need to talk right now.

Give me a sec.

- Who is that?

- Harry. My son.

Oh, come on, l must have

told you about him.

Listen, it looks like you're busy.

l knew l shouldn't have come here.

Angela.

Please give me a chance

to finish this conversation.

Please.

l'll be right back.

Son, l'm not telling you

not to get married.

All l'm saying is, how do you know

you picked the right woman...

...if you have nothing

to compare her to?

Why would l need to compare

when everything inside me...

...tells me that what

l'm doing is right?

Because some men like dry wine,

but others prefer sweet.

And the last thing you want to do

is open the wrong bottle.

ls that what you did with mum?

Opened the wrong bottle?

Don't you dare judge me.

You've been hearing...

...only one side of the story

for the last 20 years.

Maybe if you'd stuck around

a little longer, l could've heard...

...yours, too.

- Harry, a man makes a mistake...

...and gets a woman pregnant,

as l did with your mother.

He tries to do

the right thing, but fails.

Tell me, why must he pay

for it for the rest of his life?

You know what?

l don't know, dad.

Next time, try filing for bankruptcy.

- Harry.

Guys, we've been here,

for, like, an hour and a half.

l really think we should just go

with Harry's idea for the project.

Look, let me give you my coffee

theory on the marriage process, okay?

lt's monday morning.

No, it's not just any monday morning.

lt's the morning of our finals.

Now, we've been cramming...

...all weekend, and we're beat.

So needless to say,..

...there's a lot

riding on our coffee.

Anyway, you ask me to run down

to the shop for some ground roast,..

...'cause we're all out,

so l do.

Of course, l forget to ask you

what kind.

Of course.

So there l'am, checking out the

various brands, knowing full well...

...that the wrong choice

can cost us both big time!

And have they got some assortment.

l mean, they're all attractive.

Beautiful packaging.

Nice colors.

Great lettering.

- Louis, l get the point.

They're all quality coffee.

- But that's just it.

Quality ain't good enough here.

You know why?

Because we're playing for keeps.

Anyway, by this time,..

...l'm already in a cold sweat, man.

l mean, there's French blend,..

...there's house blend,

there's light blend,..

...there's columbian.

And serenade.

So finally, l crack,

and l go for the house blend.

Figure l made the safe choice.

But when we get our grades back,..

...that's when l find you

hanging from the frickin'...

...shower nozzle by your belt,

and that's when l realize...

...l should've gone for the columbian.

Could you live with that...

...for the rest of your life?

'Cause l couldn't.

l think you both need

to start drinking decaf.

Mom, hey. Look,

l can't talk right now, okay?

l'm in class.

l just... Bye.

Look, sorry.

l'm interrupting.

Oh, no, you're not.

You're not interrupting.

- You sure?

- Yeah. Have a seat.

- Everything's all right, right?

- Yeah. lt's fine.

l know that l'm supposed

to be a good daughter...

...and listen to my parents' problems.

lt's just sometimes, l get so tired...

...of listening. Sometimes,

l just don't want to.

Sometimes, l just want to

hang up the phone, you know?

- l can relate.

- lt's like l moved from...

...L. A. to New York to get away from

their fighting, and l'm still...

...in the middle, you know?

l'm still playing referee.

l know that my parents

love each other,..

...and they didn't always

used to fight like this.

lt's just, l went away to school

and it just got a lot worse.

Yeah. They love each other,

but they can't live with each other...

...or without each other, right?

- Exactly.

lt's like this dysfunctional

battle of the bands.

My mom's playing the Beatles, and my

dad's playing The Rolling Stones,..

...and how am l supposed

to choose which one is better,..

...and which one l like more?

l don't know why...

...l'm telling you all this.

- No. No, no.

Theresa, it's fine.

You can talk to me.

You know, when l finish talking to

my parents, l gotta take a walk.

l gotta run around

for miles around the city.

Just... lt helps me

clear my mind.

How do you run from the things

that run through your mind?

The faster you run,

the faster they run after you.

When l was a child,

and it was too dark outside...

...so l couldn't run, l would go

straight to my room,..

...close the door, hide under my bed,

and l would pray.

l would pray so hard for them

to just stop fighting.

- lt didn't work, did it?

- No. lt did not.

But--

Yeah, l always tried every day.

You carry that thing

everywhere, don't you?

Yeah. lt just sort of makes time

stand still, and sometimes you just...

...want time to stand still.

So what's the craziest thing

you've ever wanted to do?

- Salsa class.

- What? You?

- Yeah!

- Really?

What, you can't see me

salsa dancing?

Show me some moves

right now. Can you do that?

Not here.

We should go out for

lndian food sometime.

Really?

'Cause l love indian food.

Okay.

All right, see?

We're exactly the same.

Like that.

The same.

That, the same.

You've never been

to a Broadway play?

- Oh, my gosh.

- They're so cute.

Yeah, l started actually interning

for this wedding photographer,..

...and l just really liked it.

- Thank you for inviting me.

- Anytime.

lt means a lot.

- This one.

- Fugly.

Ugly.

lt looks like cheese.

- Bright.

- Bright?

Cheese.

Easy mac.

Four dollars to mail it.

E- vite.

- E- vite.

- Right?

That's what l say.

Okay, forget this one.

What about...

...this one?

- Too small.

Hate it.

- Too small?

- Hi, boys.

- Just who l wanted to see.

Woman's opinion.

l need you to help me...

...pick invitations for the wedding.

- This is weird.

- Look at this one.

This one's absolutely beautiful.

And the design, gorgeous.

Yeah, you could even hang it on

the christmas tree.

lt dangles.

"Harish weds Nita."

This one, Harry.

l gotta go.

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