Who Framed Roger Rabbit Page #11

GORILLA:

And here I tought we had mice.

Valiant tries to make a break for it. WHAM! The Gorilla

lays him out cold with a right cross.

BLACKOUT.

FADE IN:

VALIANT'S POV FROM FLOOR

As his vision comes INTO FOCUS, Valiant sees the Gorilla,

Jessica Rabbit, the Weasles and Judge Doom are standing over

him.

GORILLA:

... I caught him rummagin' around in

here. Then I called you, Judge, on a

counta you be da one we pay juice to.

DOOM:

(clears throat)

You did the right thing, Bongo.

THE WEASLES:

pull a groggy Valiant upright and plop him in a chair in

front of Doom.

DOOM:

Being caught breaking and entering is

not very good advertising for a

detective. What were you looking for,

Mr. Valiant?

VALIANT:

Ask her...

Valiant nods toward Jessica, who stands coolly smoking a

cigarette.

JESSICA RABBIT:

Last week some heavy breather wanted

one of my nylons as a souvenir. Maybe

that's what he was after?

VALIANT:

Look, doll, if I wanted underwear, I

woulda broken into Frederick's of

Hollywood. I was lookin' for Marvin

Acme's will.

DOOM:

Marvin Acme had no will. I should

know, the probate is in my court.

VALIANT:

He had a will, all right. She took it

off Acme the night she and R.K. Maroon

knocked him off. Then she set up her

loving husband to take the fall.

JESSICA RABBIT:

You, Mr. Valiant, are either drunk or

punch drunk. Probably both.

DOOM:

These are bold accusations, Mr.

Valiant. I hope you have some proof?

VALIANT:

I found the cover the will came in

behind the dressing table.

Valiant reaches into his pocket. But the blue envelope is

gone.

VALIANT:

(continuing)

They must've taken it off me.

DOOM:

They?

VALIANT:

The other people who were in here

lookin' for the will. I woulda caught

'em if Cheetah here hadn't interrupted

me.

The Gorilla makes a move for Valiant. Doom stops him.

DOOM:

Take it easy, Bongo. We'll handle Mr.

Valiant our own way... downtown.

VALIANT:

Downtown? Fine. Get a hold of

Santino, I'd be more than glad to talk

to him.

DOOM:

Oh, not that downtown. Toontown.

The mention of Toontown has a visible impact on Valiant.

VALIANT:

(nervous)

You're not takin' me to downtown

Toontown?

DOOM:

Indeed we are. We'll continue the

interrogation there.

VALIANT:

(very agitated)

I ain't tellin' you nothin'! Get me

Santino.

DOOM:

You're a very stubborn man, Mr.

Valiant. Very pig-headed. Boys, show

Mr. Valiant how we handle pig-headed

men at the Toontown station...

As the Weasles drag Valiant out of the room...

VALIANT:

(screaming)

No... you bastards! Leggo of me!

EXT. STREET - NIGHT

The Toon Control Wagon streaks along with the cat SIREN

WAILING. It flashes by then slams on the brakes at the

entrance to an eerie tunnel. A sign next to the tunnel says:

"Toontown".

INT. WAGON

The Weasles look over at the bound and gagged Valiant. One

of them turns Valiant's head to look at the Toontown sign.

WEASLE #1

What're you shakin' for? Didn't you

have a good time last time you were

here?

With a wicked WHEEZE, the driver floors it.

EXT. TUNNEL

The wagon disappears into the murky darkness. PAN UP to the

night sky.

DISSOLVE TO:

THE SKY - MORNING

PAN DOWN to the tunnel. We can't see into the darkness but

we HEAR HOOTING and HOLLERING from within. GUNS going off,

FIRECRACKERS EXPLODING, WHIPS CRACKING, all accompanied by

the WHEEZING LAUGHTER of the Weasles.

WEASLE #1 (O.S.)

Soo-eey! Soo-eey!

WEASLE #2 (O.S.)

Let him go, boys. I think he's got the

message.

After a beat, Valiant comes staggering out of the tunnel.

He's got a burlap sack over his head tied around his waist.

Behind him, the Weasles emerge holding paint cans and

brushes. They watch as he trips and falls by the side of the

road. The Weasles GIGGLE victoriously and head back inside.

Valiant lies there for a moment, catching his breath. Then

he struggles to free his hands. Finally he rips the sack off

his head and sits up.

CLOSE - VALIANT

We see he's got a huge Toon pig with a goofy grin painted

over his head. Valiant pulls and tugs on it, but this is a

costume that won't come off. Valiant curses, gets to his

feet and stumbles down the road.

EXT. RED CAR STOP

Valiant gets in the back of the line of PASSENGERS boarding

the Red Car.

INT. RED CAR - VALIANT

steps aboard. The Trolleyman, who we recognize as Earl from

the Terminal bar, does a double-take when he sees the

ridiculously silly looking man/Toon.

EARL:

Here's one for the books... a Toon

wearin' human clothes.

VALIANT:

Earl... it's me, Valiant.

EARL:

Eddie? Jesus, what happened?

VALIANT:

Toon cops worked me over.

EARL:

Boy, I'll say. They gave you a real

Toon-a-Roo.

VALIANT:

(apprehensively)

What am I, Earl?

Earl breaks the news to Valiant soberly.

EARL:

You're a pig... a happy-go-lucky pig.

VALIANT:

No...

EARL:

Does it hurt?

VALIANT:

Not much. It's hard to talk.

EARL:

Uh, Eddie, do me a favor. Could you

sit in the back so you won't cause as

much of a commotion.

Valiant tries to pull the brim of his hat down. But it's

comically small on the huge head. He makes his way down the

aisle past a veritable gauntlet of RAZZING, poking, tripping

PASSENGERS. Finally he finds an empty seat in the back as

the Red Car starts up.

A LITTLE KID:

wearing a baseball cap is sitting a few seats away with his

MOTHER. The Kid looks back at Eddie and laughs. He leans

over and whispers something to his Mom.

KID:

Can I, Mom?

MOMMY:

Go ahead, darling. Take your bat.

The Kid takes his baseball bat and approaches Valiant

innocently.

KID:

Hi, Mr. Pig. If I hit you on the head,

will you make me a cuckoo bird?

The Kid starts to take a swing with the bat.

VALIANT:

Kid, if you hit me on the head, I'm

gonna throw you out this window.

The Kid's eyes widen in terror. This is not a typical Toon

response.

KID:

(crying)

Mommy!

INT. VALIANT'S APARTMENT - BATHROOM - DAY

We hear the SOUND of the SHOWER. Valiant's hand reaches out

past the shower curtain and grabs for a bottle. But it's not

shampoo. It's turpentine.

VALIANT (O.S.)

Dammit!

CLOSE - TUB DRAIN

The water swirling down the drain is tinged with paint of

different colors.

CLOSE - VALIANT

He scrubs manically until the last of the pig head is gone.

He rinses off and he feels around his face. The absence of

the Toon mask seems to bring him some relief. He shuts off

the shower and slides the shower curtain back.

VALIANT'S POV - JESSICA RABBIT

is leaning up against the doorjamb, dressed as usual, in a

black cocktail dress with elbow length gloves and pearls.

JESSICA RABBIT:

Hello, Mr. Valiant. I rang the

doorbell, but I guess you couldn't hear

it.

VALIANT:

That's because I don't have a doorbell.

Jessica, caught in her lie, flutters her eyelids nervously.

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