Why Him? Page #11

to ask Stephanie to marry you.

But if it still means

anything to you,

you have my blessing.

For reals?

No clowning.

Whoa.

But, laird, Stephanie's right.

It's up to her. It's

always been up to her.

Not us.

It just took me a while

to realize that.

It's so true.

Dude, we were such jerks.

Yeah.

I bit your dick.

Shaft and balls.

Oh.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, too, dude.

Look, laird, if you wanna

ask Stephanie to marry you

when the time

is right, just do it.

Okay. Is it cool

if I do it right now?

Because, uh, just in case

it worked out

I had goose put a sh*t ton

of doves in the helicopter

and I have

a couple other surprises.

Laird, this is

totally your call.

But can I give you some advice?

Dude, please.

I'm so f***ing

nervous right now.

All right, look...

Stephanie doesn't care about

all the bells and whistles.

You know her.

She cares about you.

She loves you.

So you get down on one knee

and you speak to her

from your heart.

That's what you're best at.

Isn't that right, Justine?

Totally agree.

Holy sh*t.

My first time in Michigan.

It's cold as balls here.

Yeah.

Dude, that's f***ing great!

Do it Ned Fleming style.

Old school!

F*** yes.

Okay. Well, look...

I'll go in there and see if

I can get her to come out.

Okay.

Good luck.

Thanks.

Hey, promise me one thing.

You will treat her well.

Dude, I'm gonna treat her

like a motherfucking queen.

I'll take that.

Okay.

Gustav, change of plans.

We're go on the proposal.

No go on all that other sh*t.

I have only one bar.

You're saying we are a go, yes?

No. No go.

Go on the proposal,

no go on the sh*t.

Laird, are you saying

it's a no go

or are you saying, "no. Go."?

God damn it, goose.

You're making me f***ing

nervous. Just shut up.

Oh, I'm sorry. Good luck.

Oh, and by the way,

please, laird, breathe.

Okay.

And no cursing, okay?

F***, you're right. Good call.

Hi.

I'm sorry.

I know that out in California

I disappointed you

and that kills me.

And I'm really sorry.

I'm sorry, too.

I threw you in the

deep end out there.

I should've never

asked you to come.

Honestly. No.

No, you didn't do

anything wrong.

What was I thinking?

It was me.

It's just that, when we

got out to laird's...

I just didn't feel like

I knew you anymore

and I got scared.

I just went crazy.

This is me.

I'm doing good.

Oh, dad.

Oh, my god.

Okay, look. I forgot...

Oh, god.

He's still out there.

I know.

In a tank top and a scarf.

And he knew

we were coming to Michigan.

Yeah.

Why doesn't he just come inside?

He has to talk to you

about something...

He kind of wants to make

things right with you.

Oh, does he?

Yeah.

I think it'd be cool

if you gave him a chance.

You want me

to give laird a chance?

I thought that if you saw

fit to give him a chance...

I thought that it'd be cool.

That's all. Well?

Hi.

Hey.

What's going on? Oh, my

god, it's cold out here.

I know you're pissed,

but just hear me out.

Can we talk inside?

No.

Oh, my...

Look.

Oh, my god.

It's so romantic.

I told him to keep it simple.

Oh, our little girl.

He's gonna get down to his

knee and keep it real simple.

How do you know all this?

I gave him a few pointers.

Oh.

This has been the

happiest year of my life.

And fly! Go, go, go! Go!

Oh, no.

What?

Ah.

Oh, my god.

Goose. God damn it.

I said no go! No go!

Oh, my...

Oh, gosh. Wow.

Why did he do that?

Smart boy.

Absolute f***ing sh*t fest.

Babe, I'm so

sorry. Uh...

Stephanie Fleming...

Will you...

Are you proposing?

Yeah.

Mmm-hmm.

Did my dad know about this?

Yeah, I asked for his blessing

that first morning back in Cali.

Oh, my god.

Oh, my god!

No wonder he acted

so crazy. Honey.

Yeah, that's why he was

a little out of whack.

Yeah, we could have had

a really nice holiday.

I know. But we're all good now.

Okay?

This is a lot.

Oh, my god.

Stephanie Fleming...

That's a ring.

Goose! No!

And, go! Go, guys!

Go, go, go!

Stephanie!

Oh, my god.

Laird, what is kiss doing here?

Um, well...

Is that...

Whoa!

He got look-a-likes!

Those aren't

look-a-likes, Ned.

That's gene and Paul.

It's gene and Paul!

Gene and Paul!

Oh, my god! Oh, god!

Kiss is in the front yard!

Originally, I had this more

elaborate proposal plan

but your dad gave me

this awesome advice

and told me not to do it.

But they're here,

and I know how much you

love their music, so...

What? Hi.

Is he still proposing?

What's...

They've stopped playing now.

- His name's Ned.

- Oh, my god, are they...

What?

Are they coming in the...

Oh, my god.

They're coming up the sidewalk!

They're heading in!

They're coming in our house!

Oh, my god!

Everybody act natural!

Act naturally!

I have to redecorate the house!

Hey.

Hi.

Hi.

Uh, hi.

- I'm Ned.

- Hey, Ned.

Hi!

Hi!

This is my wife, Barb.

This is our friends,

Lou and Patty.

It's Lou.

So excited you're here.

I gotta tell you.

Uh, we are huge fans.

We've been members of the kiss

army for, like, 30 years now.

Yeah. Our first date was

the crazy nights tour.

Yeah! And, boy,

was that crazy.

Crazy.

Did you get laid?

Um...

I gave him a handjob.

Scotty.

I'm having an awesome time,

but are you having

a buffet here?

Oh, my god.

What was I thinking?

Are you hungry?

Starving.

Oh, god, of course!

Where's our manners?

We're terrible hosts.

Let's get those guitars, guys.

Come on, let me get that axe.

See my body?

Wow! Kiss is

in our house!

Yeah. I'm kind of

juiced up a little bit.

Oh! I almost forgot about them.

Well...

The happy couple.

Congratulations.

She said no.

I'm sorry, what?

She said no.

Well...

Honey.

I'm so flattered

that you wanna marry me

but I'm not ready for that.

And I'm gonna finish school.

For me.

Because that's what I wanna do.

Got it?

That's really smart.

It's just, I had this big plan

and it didn't work out.

Yeah.

Well, that's life, pal.

That is so well put, Ned.

It's really, really smart.

Dude, did you come up with that?

The words, "that's life?"

Ned, you're so full of

practical wisdom...

I was just really

looking forward

to you being

my father-in-law.

Aw.

I'm not breaking up with you.

You're not?

No, honey.

No, no, no.

I'm still your girlfriend.

We're still together.

Oh.

Oh, thank god!

Come here.

Merry Christmas.

Ned.

Hey.

Dude, your employees

are so cool.

Yeah, they are.

Maybe it was wrong of me

to interfere like that,

but why don't you

let me save your company?

No, laird, I can't.

That old model

doesn't work anymore.

I guess...

I don't know.

I guess I just didn't

want to believe it.

But since you mentioned it...

I do have a business idea

I wanna run by you.

Dude, elevator pitch me!

Okay.

No, hold on.

This wasn't my idea at all.

One second.

- Scotty, come here.

- Yo, what's up?

Come here.

Yeah?

I want you to tell laird

about the business idea

you mentioned on the plane.

Go ahead.

Wait, really?

Yeah.

Told you to get that seat

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