Ziegfeld Follies Page #3

to my nephew for an opinion.

A hundred and fifty

to my niece for an opinion.

And $ 75 for my wife's opinion.

What are you bringing them in for?

They're not lawyers.

Well, everybody's entitled

to their opinion.

Now comes my opinion: $3000.

Oh, but we're gonna win this case.

We got an ace in the hole.

- We got four witnesses.

- What? We ain't got no witnesses.

Oh, yes, we have.

Two are coming from Chicago,

and two from Detroit.

And that makes

the total expense to date...

...$463,663.63.

For goodness sake,

will you pay the 2 dollars.

It is the opinion of this court...

...that the decision

of the lower court be reversed.

- Reversed. Didn't I tell you?

- Is that good?

Silence.

As a result of the defendant's

behavior in the subway...

...a deadly germ was spread...

...which caused the death

of two citizens.

We therefore find the defendant guilty

of murder in the first degree.

And the defendant

is hereby sentenced...

...to the punishment of death.

Your Honor, we appeal.

Pay them the 2 dollars.

Give them each 2 dollars.

Victor, you have only

a few hours left to live.

Nonsense.

I've got this case all sewed up.

You've got nothing to worry about.

I had the governor

on the phone all afternoon...

...and the pardon will be here

any minute.

What would you like

for dinner, Victor?

This will be your last meal.

You can order anything you want.

- I can have anything?

- Anything.

- You take the order?

- Yes, sir.

Well, I have an order of toast...

...dry toast.

Not the thin Melba toast...

...thicker.

And a cup of cocoa...

...and some stewed prunes

and cream.

No. Better leave out the cream.

That's fattening.

Oh, come on, Victor, cheer up.

Have a cigar.

Didn't I tell you the governor

would come through with a pardon?

Arnold never lost a case.

It's a good thing you had me

as a lawyer...

...or you would have been

a dead pigeon, sure.

You're a lucky man.

Yeah. I'm a lucky man.

You ruined my business.

You wrecked my health.

You spend all my money.

My wife left me

because I'm an ex-convict.

My children are disgraced.

I'm a ruined man,

and all because of you.

You're a lawyer.

- You're under arrest.

- What, again? Hand it to him.

- Don't worry, they can't do this.

- Please pay him the 2 dollars.

- I'll have you out in 20 minutes.

- I wanted to pay them.

Don't do a thing, Victor,

until you hear from me.

Maybe it was the music

Or the glamorous sky of blue

Maybe it was the mood I was in

Or maybe it was really you

Really you

This heart of mine

Was doing very well

The world was fine

As far as I could tell

And then quite suddenly I saw you

And I dreamed of gay amours

At dawn I'll wake up singing

Sentimental overtures

This heart of mine

Is gaily dancing now

I taste the wine

Of real romancing now

Somehow this crazy world

Has taken on

A wonderful design

As long as life endures

It's yours, this heart of mine

This heart of mine

Was doing very well

The world was fine

As far as I could tell

And then quite suddenly I met you

And I dreamed of gay amours

At dawn I woke up singing

Sentimental overtures

This heart of mine

Is gaily dancing now

I taste the wine

Of real romancing now

Somehow this crazy world

Has taken on a wonderful design

As long as life endures

It's yours, this heart of mine

Somehow this crazy world

Has taken on

A wonderful design

As long as life endures

It's yours

This heart of mine

Hello, operator?

I just dialed a number.

What? No outgoing calls?

I mailed you a check yesterday.

You'll positively receive it tomorrow.

You'll leave the phone connected?

Thank you.

Please get me that number.

Hello. Is this the butcher?

This is Mrs. Ederman.

I got to have 2 pound

lamb chops right away for dinner.

No meat? I mailed you

a check yesterday.

You'll positively receive it tomorrow.

I'll get the lamb chops tomorrow.

Thank you.

I mailed you...

Oh, it's the door.

Come in.

- Mrs. Ederman?

- Yeah.

- A cablegram.

- A cablegram?

- Yeah, from... From Ireland.

- Ireland? Let me see.

- Who do I know in Ireland?

- I think you won the sweepstakes.

"Congratulations,

your ticket number 44678...

...has been drawn

in the Irish Sweepstakes."

Here. I got no change.

- Thank you.

- You're welcome.

I... I won. I won.

Well, somebody, I won.

Oi, Monty, Monty.

Hello. I won.

Oi, Ireland, what a marvelous city.

Is that you, Monty?

- Norma? Is dinner re?

- Monty. I love you. Monty, I love you.

What's the matter?

You been untrue to me?

Yes. No. I mean,

I just got a cable from Ireland.

- Monty, have I got a surprise for you.

- What is it?

The ticket you bought

on the sweepstakes?

- Yes.

- Well, it won.

We won a steak?

- We... We won the sweepstakes?

- Yeah.

A glass of water, please.

What do you mean, water?

Champagne. We're rich.

All our troubles are over.

Dance. Do something.

- Oi, Monty.

- Hurrah. We're rich.

We're rich. We got...

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

Monty, don't go crazy yet.

Wait till we get the money.

I haven't gone crazy.

Something terrible has happened.

What could be terrible

when we won the sweepstakes?

I met the landlord in the hall and

had to pay him the month's rent, $45.

So? We'll buy the house.

But you don't understand,

I only had $42.50.

To make up the extra two dollars and

a half, I gave the landlord the ticket.

So what?

- What did you say?

- I gave the landlord the ticket.

- Monty, dear, you should drop dead.

- I'll jump out the window.

Who stops you?

If he knows the ticket won,

he won't give it back.

But if he don't know,

we'll get it. Quick.

- He's out in the hall.

- Get him.

- Get him.

- Mr. Martin.

Mr. Martin. Mr. Martin.

Why, come in, Mr. Martin.

Funny, my wife

was just talking about you.

- Hello, Mrs. Ederman.

- Hello, Mr. Martin. Sit down.

- Thanks.

- You look good.

You look absolutely wonderful.

Make yourself at home.

Here. Take an apple.

- Thank you.

- You know, Mr. Martin...

...my wife is so superstitious

about that sweepstake ticket.

- Yeah.

- If you let me have it back...

...l'll give you the 2.50 tomorrow.

If that's why

you called me in, I'm going.

I've got the ticket here in my wallet

and that's where it's gonna stay.

- No, no. Sit down.

- You just arrived. Yes.

You know, you never

come around to see us...

...and we're always

so glad to see you.

Why don't you make yourself

comfortable?

- Go on. Take off your coat.

- All right.

Sure, take it off.

It's hot in here, you know.

Oh, it's so wrinkled.

I could press it for you.

Oh, thank you.

The pants is wrinkled too.

I could press the whole suit in a jiffy.

- No, never mind.

- Sure. Take off your pants.

Never mind the pants.

If it'll make you feel at home,

I'll take off mine.

No, just press the coat.

Do you know that I have a feeling

that this ticket's gonna win?

Pardon me. I don't feel so good.

Come in.

Here, Mr. Martin. Sit down again.

- Have an apple.

- Oh, thanks.

Cablegram, Mrs. Ederman.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes